30 Dandy Dad Jokes When You're a Daddy's Girl

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  • 01
    Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes My dad was bragging about his new hearing aid. "State of the Art," he said. "It cost me a fortune." I asked: "Awesome what type is it?" He said: "Two thirty."
  • 02
    Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes My favourite word is drool. It just rolls off the tongue.
  • 03
    Dad Jokes ✔ @Dadsaysjokes Somebody threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at my head. It's OK though as my injuries are only super fish oil. ...
  • 04
    Dad Jokes ❤ @Dadsaysjokes My boss said to me, "You are the worst train operator ever. How many trains have you derailed in the past year?" I said: "I'm not sure. It's hard to keep track."
  • 05
    Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes I didn't wanna believe that my dad was stealing from his work as a road worker. But when I got home, all the signs were there. H ESHRIO AUUAYE TESS BVIC 7C CALAND PRED Paine CEFS CHAE 540 500 ERNIC CHE POR RO RETING
  • 06
    Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes I took my 8-year-old daughter to the office on 'Take Your Kid To Work Day' But when we walked in the office she started to cry. As concerned staff gathered round I asked her what was wrong and she said: "Daddy where are all the clowns you said you work with."
  • 07
    Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes How did the sea feel when her boyfriend broke up with her? EmOCEANal...
  • 08
    Dad Jokes ✔ @Dadsaysjokes A detective showed up at my house and asked me where I was between five and six. I told him I was at school.
  • 09
    Dad is typing... Dad is typing... Dad is typing... Dad:
  • 10
    It's got a wooden frame, wooden engine, wooden wheels, and a wooden gas tank. Did he ride it? No, wooden start... MOULE
  • 11
    Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes When my wife is depressed I let her color in my tattoos. She just wants a shoulder to crayon.
  • 12
    Dad Jokes ☑ @Dadsaysjokes I asked my phone, "Siri, why am I so bad with women?" She said, "I'm Alexa you moron."
  • 13
    No matter how still you've been he's...
  • 14
    Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes Every morning I announce loudly to my family that I'm going jogging, but then don't go. It's a running joke. 24
  • 15
    Dad Jokes ❤ @Dadsaysjokes I accidentally glued myself to a copy of my autobiography. My wife doesn't believe me. But that's my story and I am sticking to it.
  • 16
    Dad Jokes @dadsaysjokes.com Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mom only carries one baby photo in her wallet. Because if you've seen Juan you've seen Amal.
  • 17
    Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes I'm not saying I'm attractive, but when I take my clothes off in the bathroom. I turn the shower on.
  • 18
    Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes Why was the baby jalapeno shivering? He was a little chilli.
  • 19
    My Friend Told me His Dad Sent him this to Prove that He has Hair
  • 20
    Dad Jokes ❤ @Dadsaysjokes You hear that Hulk has started recycling? He's really going green.
  • 21
    Dad Jokes ❤ @Dadsaysjokes If laziness was an Olympic sport, I would come in 4th just so I wouldn't have to walk up to the podium.
  • 22
    Dad Jokes ☑ @Dadsaysjokes A ghost walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve spirits."
  • 23
    Dad Jokes ❤ @Dadsaysjokes I hate the key E minor. It gives me the E-B-G-Bs.
  • 24
    Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes My grand father always said "fight Fire with Fire". He was a great man but a terrible Fireman.
  • 25
    Wife: Where are all the coffee filters!? Me:
  • 26
    Dad Jokes ☑ @Dadsaysjokes 'Did you hear about the pregnant bed bug?" She'll be having a baby in the spring!
  • 27
    Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes Yesterday I wore something from 5 years ago and it fit!!! So proud of myself. It was a pair of socks, But still. Let's be positive here.
  • 28
    Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes Do you know why ironing pants makes them smaller? Because it de-creases them.
  • 29
    Dad Jokes ❤ @Dadsaysjokes I can tolerate algebra, maybe even a little calculus... ...but graphing is where I draw the line. ...
  • 30
    Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes So my rum and raisin cake is gluten free. It's also raisin free. And cake free. OK it's just rum.

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